Pinky Pie

Pinky Pie R Me (although I never dreamed I would be)

Posted on: August 9, 2009

“There is nothing funny about the human body.”

With those words, Mrs. Portnoy – my fourth grade teacher – informed us there would be “no laughing about the human body.”

For those of us born in the 1950s; who were adolescents in the 1960s and went off to college in the 1970s, having a teacher named Portnoy was funny in itself. Think Portnoy’s Complaint, the Philip Roth novel.

Of course, I don’t know if Mrs. Portnoy really believed the body wasn’t funny but she was about to give us “the talk.” You know: girls in one room and boys in the other. Girls would learn about menstruation and God knows what boys would learn about. I wasn’t there.

You tell me that there’s nothing funny about that?

Anyway, on that day of non-humorous revelations  I was on the verge of awkwardness. OK, maybe it had already arrived and maybe it’s still with me 45 or so years later. But one thing I apparently didn’t learn was that there is nothing funny about the human body.

In the midst of some very serious stuff in my life I’m thinking of funny things to write and say. I toyed with the idea of calling this blog, The Boob and I, a cheap take on The King and I. It is so inappropriate that I know Mrs. Portnoy would not approve.

Frankly, I’m a little shocked that I would even consider this blog being called “The boob and I.” I have never used the word, boob, so much in my life as I have in the last few weeks during the time my breast cancer as being diagnosis.

But I play with words. That’s what I do. I make jokes and I’ve always had an inappropriate laugh.

It poses the philosophical questions: Am I my breast? Is my breast me?

I do have to say that I do some pretty boobish things and I’m not talking mammary glands here. There are times I just do goofy things unintentionally.  These are things that make great stories later and that border on oafishness (everything is a story to me). One question: once I have my mastectomy (ies) will I still be a boob?  Or will I turn into a grim, serious person who does everything correctly?

Discuss amongst yourself.

Next entry will explain the Pinky Pie reference.

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1 Response to "Pinky Pie R Me (although I never dreamed I would be)"

I can’t believe you remember such detail from 4th grade! I remember being separated and watching our Jiminy Cricket movie about menstruation but Mrs. Walker never said anything about the human body not being funny! And I can’t imagine you ever turning into a grim serious person. It just wouldn’t be you.

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